Can’t attend or won’t attend?
Today the adults move back a little. We put the child’s experience in the middle and ask what school actually feels like from their side.
Children can use the same words for very different experiences: worried, bored, sick, tired, angry, overwhelmed, left out. The question is not to diagnose from a distance. It is to hear enough to understand what is making attendance harder and what might make it more possible.
Five questions worth asking.
Start with experience, not interpretation. A child’s account is one part of the picture, but it is a part adults can too easily miss.
When does school feel easiest? Start with what works and identify trusted people, routines and settings.
When does it feel hardest? Ask about the actual school day, not only the attendance percentage.
Who notices you? A trusted adult can be the bridge between distress at home and a workable return.
What do adults misunderstand? Give the child a route to explain without having to perform distress.
What is one small next step? Make the next action achievable, named and reviewable.
Move from debate to something useful.
Agree, disagree, challenge us or add something we have missed.
Feedback is welcome from families, young people, home educators, schools, trusts, SEND professionals, local authorities, health, wider services, researchers and policymakers.